Each human being is born as something new, somethng that never existed before. He is born with what he needs to win at life. Each person in his own way can see, hear, touch, taste, and think for himself. Each has his unique potentials —— his capabilitis and limitations. Each can be a significant, thinking, aware, and creatively productive person in his own right —— a winner.

Winners have different potentials. Achievement is not the most important thing. Authenticity[n. 真实性] is. The authentic person experiences the reality of himself by knowing himself, being himself, and becoming a credible, responsive person. He actualizes his own unprecedented uniqueness and appreciates the uniqueness of others.

A winner is not afraid to do his own thinking and to use his own knowledge. He can separate facts from opinion and doesn't pretend to have all the answers. He listens to others, evaluates what they say, but comes to his own conlusions. While he can admire and respect other people, he is not totally defined, bound, or awed by them.

A winner can be spontaneous. He doesn't have to respond in predetermined, rigid ways. He can change his plans when the situation calls for it. A winner has a zest for life. He enjoys work, play, food, other people, and the world of nature. Without guilt he enjoys his own accomplishments. Without envy he enjoys the accomplishments of others.

Although a winner can freely enjoy himself, he can also postpone enjoyment. He can discipline himself in the future. He is not afraid to go after what he wants but does so in appropriate ways. He does not get his security by controlling others.

A winner cares about the world and its people. He is not isolated from the general problems of society. He is concerned, compassionate and committed to improving the quality of life. Even in the face of national and international adversity, he does not see himself as totally powerless. He does what he can to make the world a better place.

Although people are born to win, they are also born helpless and totally dependent on their environment. Winners successfully make the transition from total helplessness to independence, and then to interdependence. Losers do not. Somewhere along the line they begin to avoid becoming self-responsible.

Few people are total winners or losers. Most of them are winners in some areas of their lives and losers in others. Their winning or losing is influenced by what happens  to them in childhood.

A lack of response to dependency needs, poor nutrition, brutality, unhappy relationships, disease, continuing disppointments, inadequate physical care, and traumatic[adj. 创伤性的] events are among the many experiences that contribute to making people losers. Such experiences interrupt, deter, or prevent the normal progress toward autonomy and self-actualization[n. 自我实现]. To cope with negative experiences a child learns to manipulate himself and others. These manipulative techniques are hard to give up later in life and often become set patterns. A winner works to shed them. A  loser hangs on to them.

A loser represses his capacity to express spontaneously and appropriately his full range of possible behavior. He may be unaware of other options for his life if the path he chooses goes nowhere. He is afraid to try new things. He maintains his own status quo. He is a repeater. He repeats not only his own mistakes, he often repeats those of his family and culture.

A loser has difficulty giving and receiving affection. He does not enter into intimate, honest direct relationships with others. Instead, he tries to manipulate them into living up to his expections and channels his energies into living up to their expectations.

    我们今天的第二个板块还是Poems。对于“金钱”和“朋友”这道选择题，我们的教育告诉我们的答案是“朋友”。但是这首诗有不同的看法。

2、Poems:

Of Money
     ---B. Googe

Give money me, take friendship whoso list,
For friends are gone come once adversity.
When money yet remaineth safe in chest,
That quickly can thee bring from misery.

Fair face show friends when riches do abound;
Come time of proof, farewell, they must away.
Believe me well, they are not to be found,
If God but send thee once a lowering day.

Gold never starts aside, but in distress
Finds ways enough to ease thine heaviness.

whoso pron. 不管是谁，无论是谁。
thee pron. 你
thine pron. 你的东西
-------------------------------
我只要金钱,友谊谁喜欢就给谁，
朋友会一个个离去，只要你遭际不幸，
而当金钱安全地留在箱柜，
它就能很快使你摆脱困境。

你腰缠万贯，朋友就向你讨好，
但一有危难，他们就不辞而别，
相信我的话吧，朋友确实不易找到，
只要上帝曾让你落泊过一次。

但金钱决不会离弃你，在困顿中，
它会尽量给你安慰，解除你的苦痛。